Missing You • JIARA •

16

Kie's POV:

JJ got out of bed and walked over to me. I was crying and it wasn't because I was unhappy. I was scared and honestly overwhelmed from Ella.

I love being a mom and Ella is incredible. It can just be a lot sometimes.

"Kie, if another baby is too much right now we have options"

"Another baby is crazy right now but we don't have options. I'm pregnant. Ella is going to be a big sister and we're having our second child" I said upset that he would even bring that up

I laid in bed and didn't talk to JJ. I was up all night with our four month old daughter. I was so exhausted. I had no idea how I was going to handle being pregnant and taking care of a baby.

The next morning, JJ was at work and I was home with Ella. I called my mom and asked her to come over. I told her I was pregnant and she was estatic. She hugged me and told me how excited she was.

I couldn't even tell her how overwhelmed I felt. She was super supportive. She spent the day with me and Ella while JJ worked. I was able to catch up on some work and laundry.

My min put Ella down for her nap and I also took a nap. I woke up feeling so much better. I made an appointment for an ultrasound for the baby.

My mom went home and JJ came home. I got up and walked over to him and hugged him. He wasn't expecting this. He held me tight and I said, "We're having another baby"

"Yeah, we are" He said kissing the top of my head

"I love you and I'm sorry for the past few days. I'm just worried and a little overwhelmed"

"It's normal to feel that way. Let me know what you need from me to help you. I love you, Kie"

He kissed me and I was actually so excited to have this baby now. He came with me to my appointment a few days later. We were then taking a little road trip to visit his mom and sister.

JJ was driving and Ella was asleep in the backseat. He held my hand as he drove. We arrived hours later and his mom came running out and she hugged me first.

"How is the beautiful momma doing?" She smiled

"I'm good" I smiled as JJ hugged his mom

We went inside and Jessica finally got to hold the baby.

"She's getting so big, so fast" Jessica said as Emma came over to great us

"Yeah, I miss the newborn baby" Emma said

"Well in about eight months you'll have another newborn to hold" JJ said breaking the news

"You're pregnant?" Emma asked looking at me

"Yeah" I said as she hugged me

Jessica and Emma were also so excited for the second baby. JJ and I spent a long weekend here with his family and then we headed home. It was a long drive home as I was super nauseated.

We finally made it home and I went right to bed and JJ got Ella down and unpacked. I slept all night and JJ got up with the baby. I was up early puking. Thanks morning sickness.

JJ got up with me and sat in the bathroom rubbing my back. We told the pogues the next day and they were all so excited for us. There was a part of me who didn't understand why everyone was so happy.

The next four months of the pregnancy flew by. It was late and JJ and I were laying in bed and he said, "Kie, I love you so much and I know something is bothering you about this pregnancy. I've known since you first found out. Can we please talk about it?"

"There is nothing to talk about. I'm pregnant again"

"Yeah and that's a big deal. You're allowed to feel different emotions. It's completely valid. I never wanted kids until we started dating. Once I met you, I knew I needed to create a baby that was half me and half you. I couldn't imagine not having Ella now. I love her unconditionally and I will for the rest of my life. I never grew up feeling loved by anyone before you. I fell completely in love with you and I never I thought I could love someone the way that I love you. But somehow, I was able to love another girl just as much as I love you" JJ said and I cut him off with a look of confusion and anger

"Our daughter" JJ quickly said and I relaxed

"I love our unborn baby already so much. I'm scared to have another baby because how can I give attention and love to both kids and you. I know that I'll figure it out but I just want to make sure you and the kids always feel loved because I don't want the three of you to ever feel the way I did growing up"

I was crying and I hugged JJ and told him that I know how much he loves me.

"I'm just scared of life. I'm so fucking scared that I'm going to say or do something that will fuck Ella and our future babies up for life and they'll hate me and leave the house and never come back"

"I had a fucked up childhood and I turned out okay. You're the best mom, you won't fuck up our kids. You couldn't even if you tried" He said comforting me

We talked for an hour and then I just started crying out of nowhere. If suddenly hit me for the first time and I was so happy I couldn't contain my emotions.

"We're having another baby" I said crying

"So happy tears?"

"Yes, happy tears!" I said kissing JJ

He kissed me back and then I laid next to him and he put his hands on my stomach. He loved touching my pregnant baby.

"I love being pregnant with your babies" I said also putting my hand on my belly

"You do an amazing job growing my tiny humans. Plus you look pretty damn sexy doing it" He said kissing my neck

JJ and I made out for a few minutes before he pulled me into his arms to fall asleep. 

The next few weeks went by very quickly and I was finally not throwing up all the time. 

Tonight, my mom was coming over to watch the baby and JJ was taking me out on a date. 

I was wearing a cute dress and my bump was showing. JJ was dressed up too and he looked so hot. 

We were making out in the living room waiting for my mom to arrive. We broke apart when we saw her car pull up. I went and picked Ella up and said goodbye to her. 

I hated leaving my baby, but JJ and I needed a night out together. JJ said goodbye to Ella and my mom insisted on taking a picture of me and JJ.

We left and he took me to the mainland on the ferry where we went to a restaurant to eat. It wasn't super fancy, but it was pretty nice.

I ordered pasta and JJ got seafood. We just ate and laughed and talked over dinner. The waiter came by and asked if we wanted dessert and JJ ordered my favorite, chocolate cake. 

I smiled and he said, "Baby needs a little sugar"

JJ and I shared the piece of cake and then he paid and left the restaurant. He drove to a small park and parked the car. 

He came over and opened my door and gave me his jacket and we walked along the path as the sun was setting.

JJ held my hand and we were talking about our relationship. For a bit, I thought maybe he was going to propose, but he didn't.

We returned home and my mom left. JJ and I continued making out in our bedroom and he slipped my dress off and continued to kiss every inch of my body.

"You're so fucking beautiful, I love you" He said

"I love you too" I said unbuttoning his shirt as we continued our night together